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Please tell me that you have a list. MrBing and myself agree that it is essential to le marriage. ESSENTIAL. We have a few rules that apply in order for the list to be valid:
1. Five freebies are allowed.
2. Only celebrities may fill the list (for obvious reasons, people).
3. You may have alternates. However, if there’s a run-in with an alternate, NOTHING is permitted. (Our fifth position generally rotates through the alternates, depending on recent movies, albums, photo shoots, etc.)
4. There must be a running, “laminated” copy. Instead of actually laminating our lists, we choose to keep them official on Lainey’s website. Under “Freebie 5.” It’s totally official if it’s on her “Freebie 5.”
With those rules laid out, allow me to explain how the second Twi-man made it to my list.
This past summer, I dreamt of a new Twi-man. He appeared out of nowhere and swept me off my feet. I don’t recall thinking about him before falling asleep, but I certainly woke up thinking about him. And have been since. I fucking pranced downstairs, signed in to my Freebie5, and wiped Matt Damon from the list. Matt Damon. Enough said. Mr. Rathbone is on the list and he is staying. Tell me this photo does nothing for you and I’ll tell you all about the dream. You’ll be mixing up your list in no time. Assuming you have one. And you’d better. It’s great for your relationship, I swear it.
1. Five freebies are allowed.
2. Only celebrities may fill the list (for obvious reasons, people).
3. You may have alternates. However, if there’s a run-in with an alternate, NOTHING is permitted. (Our fifth position generally rotates through the alternates, depending on recent movies, albums, photo shoots, etc.)
4. There must be a running, “laminated” copy. Instead of actually laminating our lists, we choose to keep them official on Lainey’s website. Under “Freebie 5.” It’s totally official if it’s on her “Freebie 5.”
With those rules laid out, allow me to explain how the second Twi-man made it to my list.
This past summer, I dreamt of a new Twi-man. He appeared out of nowhere and swept me off my feet. I don’t recall thinking about him before falling asleep, but I certainly woke up thinking about him. And have been since. I fucking pranced downstairs, signed in to my Freebie5, and wiped Matt Damon from the list. Matt Damon. Enough said. Mr. Rathbone is on the list and he is staying. Tell me this photo does nothing for you and I’ll tell you all about the dream. You’ll be mixing up your list in no time. Assuming you have one. And you’d better. It’s great for your relationship, I swear it.
Welcome to the list, Mr. Rathbone. You're welcome to stay as long as you'd like.
3 comments:
*le sigh* Yes, this fine example of sex on legs fuckery has been a frequent flyer on my list for some time now. *fans self* Excellent addition to your Freebie 5.
It's a big fucking deal to add someone to The List. I'm impressed, Mrs Bing. Let's just say The JBone can certainly strum your guitar strings any time he'd like. Yum.
An official place to keep track of the Famous Freebies? I never knew such wonderment existed. *scrambles off to inspect the new site and add my list*
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