Tuesday, December 1, 2009

The One Where You Meet MrsBing

Hello, my name is MrsBing. I have a Twilight Saga addiction. My obsession began in November of 2008 and I was extremely skeptical, at first. I was quarantined to my house (thank you, RSV) and was pressured into reading the series. I had put it off as long as I possibly could, but finally succumbed against my better judgment (or so I believed). Thank God for that lapse in judgment. Twilight interested me, but Stephenie Meyer knew a thing or two about hooking a reader when she took Edward out of New Moon (the anticipation for him almost killed me!). I was a little frustrated with it until, oh, page 413:

“Edward,” was all she whispered.

Sigh. Of. Fucking. Relief. It wasn’t until I completed New Moon, however, that the realization of my addiction hit. Pages 413-563 had me totally and completely enraptured. Let me paint a picture for you. My husband was deployed at the time and my two kids (ages 3yrs and 6mos) used up every bit of my time during the day. Up until the relief known as page 413, I had been reading at night, while they slept, or during their naptime. I was already into the flight-to-Italy/Volturi-explanation/Alice-procures-a-Turbo goodness when my kids woke from their nap. Shit! I listened to them talking on the monitor while I kept reading. For a bit. When I started feeling insanely guilty for leaving them in their rooms for the sake of reading a book about vampires, mortals, and werewolves, I set New Moon down and brought them downstairs. I placed my son in his swing and set it into action. I turned on my daughter’s favorite 30-minute episode of Scooby-Doo. And I retained my position on the couch to continue reading. WHAT WAS MY PROBLEM?! I couldn’t stop.

In the end, my daughter watched that same episode 3 times in a row, back-to-back, on repeat, while I read. At one point she claimed to be hungry (yes, I started reading again without even getting them a post-nap snack) and, without looking up from the book, I said, “Sweetie, there are some M&M’s in the bowl on the bookcase. Help yourself.” Horrible. I’m sure I’ll go straight to the hot place for that one. She won the jackpot that afternoon in the glorious form of 90 minutes of cartoons and an unlimited supply of holiday M&M’s for snacking. I, on the other hand, was busy pleading my case for Worst Mother of the Year. Like I said, that was the defining moment for me. That was the beginning. I have a problem.


Kristen said...

I was the same way! My husband was also deployed...Twilight was a very good distraction. I'm sure my kid also ate some not so good dinners during the days I was reading...oops.

Kelly B said...

Well, I will meet you in that hot place if that's where all the moms of twi-orphans go.....I can't even tell you some of the questionable things I let my children do, eat, watch.....ugh! Lucky for me my husband was still here......I think, I don't really remember, too busy reading. I didn't start reading until school got out (I'm a teacher).....I started twilight on June 30th.....read straight through 4th of July (literally, there are pictures of me in a lawn chair reading with a flash light when I was supposed to be watching fireworks) and finished breaking dawn sometime on the 5th of July.......been hooked ever since!

Kellss29 said...

You sound like me!

VitaminR said...

Nice to meet you MrsBing! No worries we are all out here and just like you. I just tell my kids (4 and 7) to send me their therapy bill later....oops "No Mother of the Year Award for Me!"

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