Wednesday, May 5, 2010

The One Where It's Been Too Long, So Let's Go All In

*cracks knuckles and flexes fingers*
*exhales loudly*
*plants it on the couch and readies the laptop*

There is shame written all over this face. Our last fashion post was so long ago, it is horrifying. I want to promise that this will not happen again, but if Anntastic continues with the fic recs, I will certainly go another embarassingly long amount of time between fashion posts. Now that I am between fics, let me get down to business.

Imma gonna break down The Mr. first because he gave both loves and shits at the Tribeca Film Festival (in my lowly opinion). Thank you, thank you to this grown man for leaving lady-scarves AT HOME. They have no place on a man making his own fashion choices to begin with, but were he to break one out in April (smack! in the middle of Spring), I swear that I would leave no nice words for him in this here post. Since he steered clear, I will only shit on the sheen that killed his Awards Night suit. Why the sheen? Stop it with the fucking sheen already. Lucky for The Mr., he pulls it off much more nicely than Taylor. Maybe it's because he has a solid style and didn't pair the sheen with a fucking tux+bowtie. Just sayin'. The blue collared shirt that he chose matches his eyes perfectly, and he left it slightly unbuttoned. Adds a little sexy to the sheen, right? Even if it looks nicey-nice on Facinelli, THE SHEEN NEEDS TO STOP APPEARING. (*whispers* Unless it's in his jacket worn to the Chanel dinner. Nicefuckingchoice, for real. *wipes brow*)

There's a lot of sheen happening here. Can you see the difference in the bad sheen and the work-it sheen? There IS a difference.

Also in attendance at the Tribeca Film Festival was Nikki Reed. She showed at the premiere of Ondine and looked mighty uncomfortable in her Alice+Olivia ensemble. Why, Nikki? I found one photo of her without constipation-face. The problem was NOT her outfit, let's be clear on that. It's practically a given that Alice+Olivia delivers zero disappointment, and her choice for the evening was no exception. Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful. The blouson dress had a nice leather panel skirt (yumm-o) and that cropped jacket is trimmed with leather in exactly the right places. The best part? The jacket is named "Alice" and the dress is named "Nicky." I'll quote Anntastic here: #TwilightIsEverywhere.

If I were Nikki, I would have walked the carpet backwards, showing that little leather-clad backside to every photographer. If you can, you should. She should. Also, I'm thinking Rosalie would totes wear these pieces. What do you think?

Next up to bat is Anna Kendrick, and that's only because I'm saving the very best for last (but you already knew that). I've got two Kendrick goodies to share this time because I absolutely lovefuckinglove her style. A couple of weeks ago, she attended a party for the USWeekly Hot Hollywood Style Issue. Amen, sister friend! she showed up in one of my favorite dresses that she has ever worn. And while I am bummed to know that she's stashing her delicious collection of CoatPorn (thanks to this amazing weather), I am ecstatic to know that she's gonna bring out these little dresses again. EMILIO PUCCI, PLEASE AND THANK YOU. She is sofuckingtiny that I really feel the shorter, more petite dresses provide more flatter for her figure than the long and formal gowns do. Having said that, she did make a fab choice for the White House Correspondent's Dinner. Elie Saab haute couture for. the. win. I love when she chooses light colors, sheer make-up, and an up-do. She wore this entire look the right way, it was pure gorgessity (I'm borrowing that word, I know, but there's really no other description for her that night). She truly has a wonderful style, so classic and beautiful, so tasteful and age-appropriate, so complimentary to her body and skin tone. Kendrick knows.

So it'll never happen, but I am hoping with all of my little might that Anna will wear this dress again someday. And with a 5.5inch heel and a 1.5inch platform, all full of Sergio Rossi amazingness? YES.

Ooooh la. You know, I used to link Debra Messing with Elie Saab (word association). After a few more smart choices a la Anna Kendrick, I think that may change.

The best for last? It is obviously Kristen, obviously nailing it, obviously leaving us wanting more. She wore all Chanel to the MET Costume Institute Gala this year, and we should all be so thankful. This dress moved so nicely with her and was stunning. For her shape, for the event, for her style. It received mixed reviews, of course, but there were no complaints here. I love her so and for many reasons. Did you notice that she wore only ONE ring, where jewelry was concerned? No necklace, no bracelet, no earrings. A ring. And it wasn't a giant, look-over-here bauble. I maintain that those eyes are the only accessory she needs. The smirk doesn't hurt, either.

Smirk away, K. What with the eyes, hair, LEGS, and man... she's allowed the smirk. She's entitled to smirk. Smirky McLeggy? Also, Stewie may be thin, but SnapFace Zellweger is wasting away back there.

She will always bring the shoeporn, c'mon, it's a given. Funny thing: these exact same shoes have been worn by Kendrick on more than one occasion (in nude). Five and a half inches of loooooove.

Chanel accessories to seal the fucking deal. Her box clutch was of the onyx, stone-embellished variety (lucky bitch), and the ring was vintage (goes nicely with her hair, non?) and made of white gold and diamonds. Please to be LOVING the black polish as the perfect finishing touch.


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